Conze Edward. The Memoirs of a Modern Gnostic: Politics, people and places (Part 2)

Sherborne: The Publishing Company, 1979. — 162 p.Like all my books this one has been written three times. For the first version (marked DT1) I just dictated everything which came into my head. Those who saw the result advised me to divide the text into two parts, the first giving the story of my life, and the second my comments on all sorts of things. This version was called RT1. My friends' comments on RT1, as well as the legal scrutiny of DT1, led to the present division into three parts. The forbidden sections are now stored away in Part III. The revised Parts I and II called RT2 (1) have been duplicated and sent out to about fifty persons. Their comments revealed many minor errors. For instance, in 1961 the population of Sherborne was 7,300, and not 6,000; the gypsies in Godshill lived not in a quarry but in a sandpit; the successor to Dr. Lietz and Hitler's Minister of Culture are not the same person; and so on and so on! These mistakes have been listed at the end of the duplicated edition of Part II. Now and then I hesitated about making the desired corrections. On page 44 I describe the incident of the bomber in Godshill as I remembered it. Dr. Westlake assures me that on that evening 'there were no firewatchers at the post on Good Friday Hill, as the rota had got mixed up for the first and only time'. It is difficult to know what to make of that. Furthermore those most concerned could draw my attention to remarks which they might regard as untrue or offensive. These could then be removed in the interest of peace and goodwill. Another 1,000 copies will soon be produced by some electronic process. They will be given away to Institutions or sold to wellwishers. On reflection the title 'Memoirs of a Modern Gnostic' seems well chosen and stands the test of time in that it expresses my basic attitude in all phases of my life. The day after completing this autobiography I came by some chance across a saying (on.49) of the Lord Jesus in the 'Gospel of St. Thomas' which lays bare its basic theme and could well be used as a motto for it. 'Jesus said: Blessed are the solitary (monachos) and the elect. For you will find the Kingdom! Because you have issued from it, you will again return to it'. The title has, however, two small drawbacks. Many people seem not to know what a 'Gnostic' is, and for the French translation the title will probably have to be altered (2). The first of these points reminds me of a problem which I have been unable to resolve. Some readers have suggested that I should add a Glossary, explaining all foreign words, allusions to historical figures and events, psychological jargon and philosophical profundities. I would be grateful to hear the opinions of others. On the whole I am against the idea and that not only from laziness. All literature depends for its effects on allusions and overtones. Its charm evaporates when everything is explained in footnotes, just as jokes wither when explained. In the course of my life I must have heard thousands of sexual jokes. They interest me so little that my mind refuses to admit them, and I can never remember any. Except perhaps one from America of which I am reminded each time I see our local Sherborne Liberal News Sheet, which is called FOCUS. Here is the joke: Two Swedish house maids are having their picture taken. 'Why is he looking at us like that?' 'He has got to focus. ''No, tell him just to take the picture first. He is sure to rumple our best dress.' If you know of the position of Swedes in 19th Century Mid-West society (3) this is really quite funny; but not otherwise. In addition to the tediousness of these explanations there seems also to be no limit to them. Here is another story from Wisconsin, illustrating the pitfalls of East-West relations. A Japanese Professor approaches me reverently, assures me that I have a great reputation for the clarity of my literary style, but confesses that he himself could not get any meaning whatsoever out of the following sentence in the Introduction to my 'Buddhist Scriptures' (p. 16).This is what he read out to me, 'When, like others before me, in the middle of my journey through life I had strayed away from the right road, it was he (D. T. Suzuki) who re-opened my eyes to the splendour of the Buddha's message'. To which I replied, 'This refers to, Nel mezzo dell'camin di nostra vita — Mi ritrovai nel una selv'oscura — Che la diritta via era smaritta.' He wrinkled his eyebrows in pained disbelief, and I added, 'These are, as you know, the first lines of Dante's Divine Comedy.' He gave the embarrassed laugh which you hear from Japanese when they feel that you pull their legs, I saw the situation was hopeless and apologised for my existence. I often wonder how many of such references we miss in our own studies of Asian literatures. I have used the same allusion in these 'Memoirs' on I, p.27. Should I explain it? If I did where would I stop? In the days when Ellen Wilkinson used to teach me how to write English she constantly reminded me, 'Edward, never forget that people expect to be told that C, A, T, spells cat.' This advice has done much for my prose style. On the other hand it may be more applicable to the readers of the 'Daily Express' than to those whom I expect for this SAGA. That became clear to me when recently I said to a friend, 'Now that we have had De Medietate Lunae and have seen what Malachy meant by his motto (4), we must wonder whether he was also right about his three successors, particularly in view of what Huang Hua, the Chinese Foreign Secretary, told us today about the prospects of an Atomic World War.' What, of course St. Malachy prophesies is that the third Pope from now, near A.D. 2,000, will be the last one and will see the end of life on earth (5). I soon wished that I had expressed myself a bit more directly because the explanations had to be multiplied endlessly. So I feel that on the whole I have done right in bravely aiming at an educated public. It is ironic that the audience which I envisage should have largely ceased to exist (6), but it is symptomatic of much of my life. Again and again the rug has been pulled away from underneath my feet. The Index of Names is the work of an old and trusted friend, Marianne Winder, a librarian, who twenty years ago translated 'Buddhist Texts' into German. She emphasizes that she does not associate herself with all the views expressed in this autobiography, least of all with the passages about Christmas Humphreys who, she declares, has been the most beneficent influence in her life. For a time I had the assistance of Mrs. Rosemary Holland, who had just graduated in History from Kings College, and who verified many facts for me. For the German period I have also had help from Herrn Herbert Elbrecht in Frankfurt, a helpmate whom I have never met. The mechanics of the enterprise have been in the capable hands of Mrs. Daphne Mitchell. Her birthday falls on nearly the same day as my mother's and it is thus no surprise that she should share her ready intelligence, effortless competence and prompt and precise performance. As indispensible as she was my friend Dr. F.G. Brook with whom, up to August, 1978, I discussed every sentence, often at great lengths. He has preserved me from many infelicities. Now that he has been taken away from us, there is no one to quite take his place. The intellect of people with Mercury in Pisces is well known to be more fertile than accurate. I have often been surprised by the elementary nature of my mistakes on matters of detail, and the unreliability of my memory. What has heartened me, however, is that all the errors discovered so far have been due to sheer carelessness, and none seems to be self-serving. The list of those who have sent in corrections fills two pages, and I have decided to scrap it. (7) Not everyone concerned would wish their names to be associated with a work of this character. May it suffice to say that my brother has seen to it that nothing detrimental to the honour of the Conze family has survived, while my wife Muriel has endeavoured to expunge whatever might be to my discredit, or make me appear small or miserable. Nevertheless a few awkward facts may have seeped through here and there.
October, 1978(1) I have made great efforts to recover all the copies of DT1 and RT1, but regret to say that a few people seem to have taken photocopies of them. In so far as these superseded drafts contain libellous matter I must warn those who distribute them that it is they, and not I, who legally speaking commit the libel. — RT3 indicates that RT2 has been retyped once again.
(2) For Mgr. Lamotte's comments see Appendix 10, no. (01).
(3) 'For on the plains where once there roamed the Indian and the Scout,
The Swede with alcoholic breath plants rows of cabbage out.'
(4) i.e. Pope John Paul was installed on September 3rd, the day following the New Moon of September 2nd, and he died on September 28th, four days before the New Moon of October 2nd. His reign lasted almost exactly one Lunar Month or 'between two Moons'.
(5) Perhaps Maggie and her Shylock may after all be permitted to do their bit for the Freedom of the West.
(6) Fifty years ago D. H. Lawrence predicted the collapse of this class in his masterly, 'How Beastly the Bourgeois is —' (The Complete Poems II, 1957, pp.159-160). It is too long to be inserted here.
(7) Now that the printing has been accomplished, I cannot, however, omit to thank Dr. Lance Cousins, of the Department of Comparative Religion at the University of Manchester, a keen Buddhist scholar who has been on the spot to smooth over many difficulties.